How my mother skills are lacking....

Ok probably should not advertise this but when they were handing out mothering manuals, I think mine got lost in the mail. Here are a few examples:

• This morning I was left in charge of feeding Parker breakfast. After a long debate about which breakfast would be the least amount of work for me, we decided on ceral. Well all the spoons were dirty so I made him eat his ceral with a measuring cup.
• I asked Parker if he felt like I was paying too much attention to the puppy. He said no, so I said "well get out of here then so I can hug the puppy".
• Parker recommended that I take the birth control pills advertised on TV so you only have PMS 4 times a year. This is bad for 2 reasons: 1. I am so grumpy that he is trying to limit my PMS to a quarterly event. 2. How much TV is this kid watching that he can tell me the name of the pill, how it works and what the side effects are!?
• He is terribly freaked out by the Christmas "Elf on the Shelf", so I found one and started putting in different locations throughout the house. Like next to his toothbrush, facing his bedroom door, in the refrigerator. Everyday he would find it and make me promise not to do it the next day and tell me how UNfunny I am, but I did it anyway. Jeff finally hid it from me so I would stop traumatizing the kid!
  

The most important thing is that this kid is the World to me! I hope this post will be taken as light hearted and that no one reports me to CPS! Thanks again to my wonderful husband, without which we would be wearing potato sacks and living under a bridge.

True Story Expriences Today!

Stopped in at McDonalds today for lunch. We ordered a McRib sandwich and the following happened:

• "oops we are out of McRib"
• cashier has cigarette tucked behind her ear. You gotta keep it somewhere, right?
• "here is your money back for McRib"
• Jeff says "well can I order something else, I really need some replacement"
• okay we will take a Penguins of Madagascar happy meal, everyone loves Penguins!
• Penguins of Madagascar happy meal contains one "Ice Age 2" Sabre tooth tiger toy. When did that movie come out??
• (picture is just funny, has nothing to do with our experience today)
  

Next Stop Super Target

• cashier: "Hi how are you toay?"
• Jeff: "Fine, how are you?"
• cashier: "terrible"
• Jeff (thinking cashier is just partaking in some witty banter): "terrible??"
• cashier: "I am not going to lie and say I am fine when I am terrible"
• Jeff: silence
• cashier: "OK, here is what is happening... I need a guys opinion. You know when you have a girl spend the night, and then you are not quite awake and you call her 'Jessica' when her name is not Jessica?"
• Jeff: "hmmm.... not good?"
• cashier: "I have asked a bunch of guys today and they don't know what I should do, and the girl won't talk to me"
• Jeff: awkward silence
• Parker (9 year old son): awkward silence
• cashier is now clearly agitated that witty banter has ceased and customers are uncomfortable. proceeds to start flinging clothing purchases very hard down onto counter and throwing them into the same bags as our food. Poor deviled eggs never had a chance.
• maggie: "I think that cashier has watched the SNL Target skit one time too many"
• Jeff: "The girl in the dressing room seemed as miserable as that cashier, what is going on at this target?"
• maggie: "maybe dressing room girl is cashier boys girlfriend?"

Highlight of the day: Went to Greyhound Rescue of Austin garage sale and met the nicest and most helpful people. Note to Target and McDonalds employees... these people are volunteers not getting paid and are wonderful! Keep up the great work and thanks for all you do to the Greyhound Rescue!

Thinking of opening new Etsy Store

I am thinking of opening a new Etsy store to focus just on my sock creatures. Here are some of the names I am thinking about.

• Wanted Creatures
  
• Sock Stars
• OH! That's where my other sock went
• Creature Feature
• Creature Comforts

Not sure which is best. Any thoughts?

Remembering

When I was growing up and would hear my parents or grandparents talk about stuff they had in "their day", it made me feel so lucky to live in an age with a bunch of super cool high tech stuff. Now when I talk about what I grew up with to 20 somethings or younger (cringe), I seem just as lame as my parents did to me. (Side note: That makes my parent's stuff super lame, I mean they were happy the toilet was inside the house!). So here a few of the items that I felt could never be approved upon when I was growing up.

• VCR with remote control - the remote control was tethered onto the VCR of course via cord. It was much more expensive than the iPod Touch!
  
• CD Player - It was as big as our turntable. We kept our CD player next to our record player and it cost like a million dollars!
• The ability to rent movies that you could never afford to buy. We must have rented dirty dancing every weekend for 6 months! It cost almost $100 to own a video tape movie.
• The ability to print banners on your home printer. Remember those printers that ran through stacks of paper by pulling it from the holes? And you had to pull off all those perforated edges? You could print a really long banner that could say Happy Birthday or something and color it in with markers.
• Microwave Oven - what strange technology is this?? What do you mean my tv dinners are now in plastic trays??!! Swansons turkey and gravy never tasted the same after that...
• 2nd phone line - What?? You mean I can have my own phone number that is for my room only?? My head is about to explode from happiness!

Thank you for strolling down memory lane with me. If you have anything to add, feel free to add it to the comments section!

Signs I am addicted to Video Games

Ever since I got my Atari 400 in 1980 something I have been in love with video games. We got the Pac Man game and a cool red joystick. Oh how I love the sound the ghosts make when you eat them. I also wanted to do everything my older (super nerdy, star trek watching, D&D playing) brother did. He loved video games, so I did too. Here are some things I do almost daily to prove that I still love video games.

- While I am watching TV I keep my Nintendo DS in my lap to play Soduku during the commercials.

- While I wait for my computer game to load, I play my hand held game to kill the 60 seconds of load time.

- I get motion sickness playing video games, but I still play until I feel like vomiting is imminent.

- I have literally fallen asleep holding a game controller

- I secretly don't want to "beat" a game, because then the honeymoon is over... =(

Love you Bro! Thanks for encouraging this nerdy, wonderful game addiction. This started out as a I love video games post, but turned into a mushy "I love my brother" post. (vomiting imminent)

Things I have learned since getting a dog

I have learned a few things about myself since deciding to add a puppy to the family. The most interesting thing is how similar the dog is to my son.

- dogs still have to be walked when it is cold and raining. Just like my son still needs to be driven to school when it is cold and raining.

- dogs and little boys come home filthy! You were outside for 2 seconds! Now you are dirty and have fleas! Although the dog gets a point for not throwing the dirty clothes on the floor.

- Puppies will literally eat your homework. I have heard of that but thought it was an old wives tale. So the dog and son both equally, but for different reasons, hate homework.

- Both the boys think bedtime is negotiable

- They both have questionable bathroom habits

- Both puppy and son are willing to cuddle with me when they don't feel well. But in school or the dog park it's "mom, not here!"

- They both know that "puppy dog eyes" will get me everytime

- Neither of them want to put on their coats

- The dog and my son would be perfectly happy for me to sleep on the couch if it means they could lay in my bed and mess up my clean pillows.

- They both beg for treats

I could go on, but there is too much to list. Boys, Boys, Boys!

Valentine's imperfections

This picture just kind of sums up the day to day goings on at home. A child or animal is constantly running amok, malfunctioning, or emitting foul odors.

With Valentine's Day here, this picture also sums up the loves of my life (including husband not pictured). They are imperfect, challenging, odor emitting, generous, loving and so much more!

I love you boys!